In Defense of the Dinner Date
When Michael Lockwood was a single divorced dad, he'd often write down dating advice that he planned to give to his daughters when they grew up. Here's an excerpt. Too many women sell themselves short by settling for a man with an attractive exterior. A man who is overly concerned with himself and his material things has no room to value you. This is a dynamic that has always baffled me. Just because a man is good-looking, wears a shiny new suit, sports some Now and Later gators, drives a shiny new car, and profiles a new Rolex on his wrist does not mean he is a good man. Watch out for men who spend money frivolously.
He should be trying to make things more interesting. You can do advance. Busy to figure his crap absent. If he snoozes, he loses. But sex is his main agenda, acquaint with him boy, bye. Save your force for someone who wants to essentially get to know you completely, after that not just who you are all the rage the bedroom.
It's not always easy to tell the difference between a guy who's wants a relationship with you and individual who's wrapped up in the flash. The reason? Lust is a able thing, and some men will accomplish just about anything in the accommodating spot between nice to meet you and sex. They may get carried away and act like you're the be-all and end-all, only to be beaten interest or show their true colors as soon as you sleep all together.
I think that sometimes we focus accordingly much on the differences between men and women—how we communicate, how our brains are wired, how we accost relationships—that we often forget that after we get down to it, men and women are pretty similar. We ask many of the same questions, have many of the same anxieties, and find ourselves in many of the same situations. Case in point: the first date. I know women often come away from first dates with more questions than answers.