What I learned talking to 120 women about their sex lives and desires

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Around might be love. There might be commitment. There might be a concrete friendship at its core. Worth it — but hard. Desire feeds animal intimacy which in turn feeds association, nurturance and the protective guard about relationships. Intimate relationships in which appeal has faded can take on the shape of housemates or colleagues.

I spoke with widows, newlyweds, monogamists, clandestine liaison seekers, submissives and polyamorists after that found there was no such affair as desire too high or at a low level. Male desire is a familiar account. We scarcely bat an eyelash by its power or insistence. In , as experts weighed the moral after that medical implications of the first lady libido drug , I found for my part unsatisfied with the myths of additional and deficit on offer, and adjust out to understand how women themselves perceive and experience their passions. Above the course of five years, I talked with women and dozens of sexual health professionals. My reporting took me from coast to coast, after that spanned conversations from a year-old certain she was sexually damaged to a year-old learning how to orgasm.