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Dolan is a professor at the London School of Economics. In his new book, Happy Ever After: Escaping the Myth of the Perfect LifeDolan matter-of-factly pits fairytale archetypes of marital bliss against the empirical evidence. Unfortunately, Dolan inadvertently misunderstood the data that justified this particular sage advice. He based his opinion on telephone poll results supposedly showing that women professed lower happiness levels when their spouse was out of the room, which would theoretically produce a more honest answer. Being married was probably not what made the women in the survey less happy—it was separation from their spouse. According to science, no. Historically, large studies show that, on average, married people report greater happiness later in life than unmarried people. Separated and divorced people tend to fall into a less-happy bucket, while the never-married and widowed fall someplace in between.
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Inmy wife Toni and I celebrated 30 years of marriage. I love this picture of us leaving our bridal reception, because in many ways it show us stepping out into the world when we honestly had Denial IDEA what life would bring us. We just had hopes and dreams. I have no data on this, but I think leaders perhaps battle in their marriages more than others do. Global crises make that constant more complicated as all the accent at work comes home. And Toni and I have had our allocate of struggles for sure. Both of us have felt more pain than we ever knew was possible, after that more deep joy than we always realized existed.
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