What Sleeping With Married Men Taught Me About Infidelity

Natalie Gil photographed by Refinery But the claim, which racked up aboutlikes and over 41, retweets, flies in the face of all we've come to believe about the friend zone over the years. Traditionally, in Hollywood rom coms, comedies, TV shows and memes, it's straight men who find themselves in the unenviable friend zone, having been rejected romantically by a woman who's either not attracted to him in that way or says she values their friendship too much to risk romance. The reality, though, is that friend-zoning happens to men and women seeking heterosexual relationships, and as the response to the aforementioned tweet suggests, it's happening a lot. In a patriarchal Western culture that still values dominant masculinity, stories and recollections of heterosexual relationships tend to show men pursuing women and trying to renegotiate the relationship, rather than the other way around. Men are potentially more focused on sexual or romantic love when embarking on relationships with women, whereas women can sometimes be more choosy about where they put their romantic attention and time, Bose theorises. On the more controversial point about casual sex with a friend, in Bose's counselling experience men and women do sometimes view it differently.

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